


my death, it haunts me

by Zenaida0



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Established Keith/Lance (Voltron), I'm so sorry, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, M/M, klangst, one of them dies I'm sorry, songfic i think, well kill me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:00:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27966464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zenaida0/pseuds/Zenaida0
Summary: Keith is ready to fight everything that makes Lance cry.inspiration: Crying All The Time by Alexandra Savior
Relationships: Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 43





	my death, it haunts me

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry. I guess?  
> Hello, I'm Zen and I tried to use my shitty English to make you cry. I know it's not perfect, it's not even good, I swear, it can be better, but my heart just says "Just do it now". It's 1:30 AM and I post it even though I may regret it in the morning. Anyway, here's some angst, I'd love to know if you liked that :o

_My death, it haunts him like a ship without a sail…_

The death menace had hung over them for a long time. Since they’d joined the Voltron, to be honest. This is how being a warrior works. They can’t escape the death’s shadow. They’d got used to it, slowly, but relentlessly. They’d cared for each other – being in one team had made them a real family. They’d loved each other. They’d been close. They still are. And they always will be, right? All experiences from the war had created unbreakable bonds. As long as they’d trusted each other, they’d been unstoppable. Their strength had done all of this. The’d achieved so much because of the love and suport. Now, after the war, with a peace, everything is just fine. Or it should be.

Keith Kogane doesn’t dream. His night is dark and warm, without any images, sounds or problems. He can’t say when was the last time he’s had an actual dream. All of his nighmares from the past are hidden in the farthest corners of his memory. He doesn’t want them in his life anymore. He is over it. He understands the reasons that guided his father back to this burning house. He understands why his mother had to leave him. He understands everything and forgives everything. He doesn’t want the past to invade his future. His future, laying in his arms every night.

But now there is one thing that keeps haunting The Black Paladin’s dreams. The one thing that doesn’t let him sleep. He holds his future in his arms, touches the smooth skin, smells that sweet, fruit shampoo on brown curls, looks at beautiful lips. He feels the steady heartbeat, hears it whenever he lies on a flat chest. And he keeps hearing those damned words.

„I died there, Keith. I died and Allura brought me back to life.”

The death is present in his dreams.

Now Lance is alive. Very much alive. Keith is next to him, can feel his warmth, the life flowing under his skin. Yet Keith still remembers these words and can’t forgive himself for not being there. He wasn’t there to hold Lance, to see him waking up, to tell him that everything is just fine, that he is alive and Keith is going to make sure it never happens again. Not to him. The love of his life.

He gave him the promise. And he plans on keeping it.

After the war, all of them needed to heal all wound. They had to accept the biggest loss in their lives. They lost their dearest friend, the commander, the Princess. Allura was important to them. She knew everything right from the start. When Keith and Lance came to her back then, in Castle of Lions, nervous, but determined to tell her about their relationship, she was already waiting with the biggest grin and some tea.

Her death left them shaking, with burning scars on their hearts. Yet they were still alive, strong, together.

_I know I’ll be gone soon, but just for him, I will prevail…_

After the war, there was still a lot of things to do. He knew that he could handle it, with his mother, the Blades and other allies. But, most importantly, he knew that Lance couldn’t make it. Keith saw his beloved’s blue eyes filled with sadness and nostalgia. Lance healed, but not completely. He still was having panic attacks, he was crying in his sleep. Sometimes Keith heard him talking about the death he’d met there, in Red Lion.

Death is something that’s going to get them, one way or another. And Keith is determined to keep it away from Lance as long as possible. This is why he leaves the Earth for some time. He wants to make sure nothing will attack them again. He wants Lance to spend the rest of his life with him, in a small house with a garden, not so far from the desert where he used to live. He wants to swear to him. He wants to make love to him. He wants to raise children with him. But the death was still following Keith.

_He doesn’t like it when I cry…_

Keith doesn’t like to see Lance crying. In fact, he hates it. He hates seeing salty tears streaming down the most beautiful face. He hates reasons why these tears appear. And he desperately wants to fight all of them. So, now he’s in space, trying to bring peace on every planet they can.

And Lance waits for him. When Keith is with him, he is happy. His life is full. He has all his love that warms his heart, his soul, makes him feel… perfect. After many years spent together in the Castle, in Voltron, they know they are meant for each other. Red and blue. Fire and water. All darkness disappears from Lance’s life, when he sees big, violet eyes filled with love and tenderness. He doesn’t need to cry.

_My death, it taunts me like a ship without the sail…_

The death still follows Keith. It leaves its shadow on his life. And it also stays with Lance. Mocking his life, reminding him of the last time they were the one. When he looks into the mirror, he sees it. In his eyes, not trying to hide. Present, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. Reminding him that nothing is permanent. Not even his future.

He washes his face and wipes it with a small towel. Dark circles under his eyes are screaming about another sleepless night. He feels bad. Nervous. His dreams were filled with anger, betrayal, screams and blood. He woke up covered in sweat, trembling, sobbing. He wanted to call Keith so much, but he knew this was a secret mission, so he left his phone and went for a long walk. He saw the infinite of the stars and wondered if one of the lights belongs to Keith’s ship.

Someone knocks at the bathroom’s door.

„Lance?” Veronica asks, with a voice that doesn’t sound like hers.

„Yeah?” He slowly leaves the room and looks at his older sister. She stands here, pale, shaking, with a pain in her eyes.

And, suddenly, he knows. He understands his nightmares. This creepy feeling, heavy on his heart.

„Last night… there was an attack on the ship on Pluto” she whispers, tears falling from her eyes. „Rebels found it and…” She starts sobbing. „I can’t. Lance, I can’t, I’m sorry, I…”

Lance holds her tightly.

„Hey. Ronnie. Ronnie, please. Just… tell me.” His voice is breaking.

„They… they destroyed their ship. Acxa… Keith… scouts found the wreck.” She takes a deep breath. „Lance… no one survived.”

He knows best not to cry with Keith. He doesn’t have to. Because Keith is his reason to smile. His reason to live. He drives away all his nightmares. He takes away his reasons to cry.

But now Keith is gone, so _he’s crying all the time_.


End file.
